For a few weeks now, I have been dropping not-so-subtle hints that I was leaving the United Kingdom. Family and friends were generally clueless and curious as I gave vague answers. The matter of fact was, I was feeling pretty uncertain. Also, nervous and I guess I preferred avoiding the subject in great detail like there was some sort of subconscious taboo.
But in the recent week, things have become clearer yet surreal too. Right now, I'm headed to the United States on a long ass flight. It is long because I didn't have time to make a Japanese transit visa which would have made the flight several hours shorter.
I suppose the next natural question that 'll succeed "where are you going?" is "why have you gone (there)?".
Wow. That is a big question. It is big because there are so many layers to it and ways to approach it. And, I guess it would depend who I am talking to as well.
Maybe I should try and tackle it now seeing that it'll probably be a question my new colleagues might pose to me. But right now, that's kinda boring to think about so let's start with what I have been thinking about.
I think, 'Why not?'. Afterall, life begins at the end of one's comfort zone. I know the ropes of working in the UK and Malaysia. America is regarded as a a challenge and I do feel challenged to discover my potential. To see another part of the world and experience it first hand. And, I think this helps me appreciate how lucky I am... And how things could be worse or better... And how I could be a happier and better person... And the list goes on.
I have also been thinking it is totally ironic I am headed to America because America was the reason that, well, changed my hopes and dreams in September 2011.
There were two people who were instrumental in encouraging me to 'break into America' as they call it. The first came first and was none other than my mentor. The second was my ex-boyfriend who was dead set on going that he got all the preliminary stuff done and I took the plunge and did it too.
I guess as the ex-boyfriend knew he would play a fair part in my decision to go to America. He knew I'd go back to Malaysia should he insist. Or even Singapore or Australia. I think he tried a lot of tactics to discourage me to follow him and it's strange how he had to come out with the truth to make me decide rather than passively follow.
My friend ES says never to follow a man. I now try to live by that rule but it is also strange how not having had lived that rule set me free.
And, maybe my ex didn't expect me to choose to go to America but I did.. backed by my mentor. Afterall, I've done the motions and why not?
I guess I could give a cliched answer as to "Why America?" but where is the challenge in that?
Why not? That's what I would like to open with. It liberated me. It'll liberate me even more if I succeed; I see so many doors unlocking. I hope it'll make me a better, happier and more open-minded individual who will contribute to society. I'm up for a challenge. So, why not?